laurah2215

Greetings, readers. The lovely mod over at Sorkinverse (http://community.livejournal.com/sorkinverse) has posed a simple challenge for us to create a list of top 5 Aaron Sorkin characters. Well, it turns out this is not such an easy task for me. I just have an affection for too many characters from too many of his series and movies. I'm not sure I can narrow it down, but I'm going to have to for the sake of this post. So, I've decided to select my top 5 from only The West Wing, since it's been too long since I've actually watched Sports Night or Studio 60. So, without further ado, my top 5.

1. Margaret Hooper: I gotta say, I fell in love with the delightful assistant as soon as she claimed she could forge the President's signature. As witty as she is colourful, Margaret was always a treat to find lingering around Leo's outer office. Able to cheer him up and bring him out of a surly mood, nobody knew Mr. McGarry better than Margaret. Margaret, in my opinion, also served as a leader amongst the clerical staff, the glue that held the assistants together. Margaret was simply never en-oeuf!

2. Charlie Young: With sharp intelligence and labrador-esque loyalty, Charlie served as an incredibly inspiring young staff member. I loved his ability to adapt with the office and his colleagues, and to always know how to handle difficult situations. His wit was always surprising, too. With his humbling humility, one couldn't help but learn a lesson about the true nature of life in the West Wing.

3. CJ Cregg: What can I say? Modeled after the first female Press Secretary in American History, Bill Clinton's campaign media guru Dee Dee Meyers, CJ Cregg embodied the great strides women have made in the male-dominated field of politics, and the obstacles they still encounter today. "Delightful and delicious", CJ's sly wit and cunning charm managed to win over not only the Press Room but her colleagues, eventually leading the President to promote her to Chief of Staff after Leo's health took a turn for the worse. In my opinion, she had a nice balance of confidence and vulnerability that professional women often have a difficult time trying to find. I found the character to be one of Sorkin's most realistic and human, certainly inspiring.

4. President Josiah Bartlet: As cliche as it might be to select the President, Jed Bartlet truly is a one-in-a-million personality. A bleeding-heart liberal, a devout Catholic and a devoted father, Bartlet's personal ethics made him a complex and absolutely astonishing character that TWW fans fell in love with. Week-to-week, the internal struggles the President faced at home and in the West Wing provided opportunities to witness the incredible character that Sorkin sketched in this man. From "Two Cathedrals" to "The Two Bartlets", each episode was rich with Sorkin's amazing ability to create complex, nuanced and incredibly real characters, of which Jed Bartlet was the best example.

5. Josh Lyman: Because of his complicated personality, the character of Josh Lyman is one of Sorkin's most well-developed characters. Josh Lyman, throughout the series, battled many demons that had bothered him from childhood. Deeply loyal and committed to serving the President and his country, Josh's sense of duty was unfaltering. Loving and empathetic, he was always there for his friends and loved ones. While Josh's issues were not always solved in the end (more as a result of the fact that Sorkin was not writing toward the end of the series,)his overall character was developed throughout the show.

Hey, everyone. So I'm writing today to shamelessly promote a challenge-based fan community called sorkinverse. We're all fans of the writer Aaron Sorkin and engage in friendly competitions on behalf of his three television shows. It's so much fun and a great way to interact with other Sorkin fans. Members create art, write, play Bingo, test their trivia and participate in a variety of luck-based games. So, I encourage all of you to head over to http://community.livejournal.com/sorkinverse and join the community. If you want to join, please tell them laurah2215 sent you, so that I can earn points for my team, Team West Wing. Thanks!

Title: Chasing the Dream

Author: Laura H

Disclaimer: If I married Aaron Sorkin, would I own the rights to The West Wing and the characters? It’s an intriguing thought, even if he is over twice my age. But, oh, that brilliant mind!

Rating: PG

Synopsis: Abbey has a chance to have her own career.

Author’s Notes: It’s my study week for school, so I was able to finish this story that I’ve been working on.



“Beautiful dismount!” Danny declares, pumping his fist into the air as his daughter lands a flawless routine on the uneven bars.





“How do you not hold your breath every time she gets on those things?” CJ asks her husband from her seat next to him. They are sitting with the other parents in the seating area across from the gym floor. She and Danny don’t usually get to view Abigail’s gymnastics practices on Tuesday and Thursday evenings, so they try to make a point of watching her weekly Saturday morning practices at the club she’s involved in.





“Because she’s been doing this since she was five years old and I have total confidence in my daughter,” Danny replies with conviction. “ Besides, didn’t you do gymnastics and figure skating as a kid?”





CJ tenses her back. “And as a girl who didn’t have half the talent Abbey has, who took many falls off the uneven bars and a really traumatic fall in figure skating, I can say that I’m terrified every time she’s in a competition and goes full out.”





Danny shrugs nonchalantly, still smiling as Abbey gives them a little wave and moves on the mats over to the beam. “She knows what she’s doing, darling. She’s not going to get hurt.”





“Hey, Danny, CJ.” A sweat suit-clad petite woman with blonde hair pulled into a ponytail approaches CJ and Danny.





“Hey, Val. Good to see you. How’s she been doing out there?” Danny points to his daughter in the pink leotard amongst the dozen other girls in the gym practicing their routines on the beam, vault, bars and floor.





Abbey’s coach grins, observing the teen on the balance beam. “ Glad you asked. I was hoping you both would drop in today. Can we chat in my office?”





Danny can’t help but smile expectantly at CJ, who nods her compliance. They follow the coach out of the floor area and through the hallway to the coach’s office.





“Take a seat,” Val suggests, pointing to two plastic chairs in front of her desk as she closes the door to her office.





“Has she been putting chewing gum in the other girls’ hair, maybe going into their gym bags and hiding their underwear?” CJ half giggles.





The coach laughs along while pulling a yellow file folder out of a drawer and handing it to Danny. “I put my whole life into this gym, and these girls are like my family. You know how much I care about Abbey, but I’m afraid the time has come for her to go.”





Danny’s face falls. “ I don’t understand. She’s the best ranked gymnast on the team. She’s your best asset at all the competitions.”





Val’s lips curl into a smile. “ I know. And, unfortunately, she’s outgrown this club.”





“Out grown?” CJ doesn’t understand what the coach is trying to tell them. They’ve been sending Abbey to this gym for almost ten years.







Val directs the parents’ attention to the papers in the folder. “I need to think about Abbey’s future. I took the liberty of sending a video from our latest invitational competition against the San Francisco team out to a few friends of mine who run elite clubs throughout the country. Abbey won gold at the competition and received the highest mark for the floor routine of any girl in the state of California last year. Well, the feedback I got was pretty overwhelming.”





Danny’s lips form a closed mouth smile. He’s intrigued to hear the news. “What kind of feedback?”





“Everybody wants her,” the coach declares seriously, barely containing a smile.





Danny no longer tries to hide his grin. “ Really? Like who?”







“ Well, there’s the Naperville Gymnastics Club in Illinois. The WOGA in Texas, Sharp’s Gymnastics Academy in Pittsboro, and All Olympia right in L.A,” Val informs them, joining the proud father in his excitement. CJ, however, isn’t smiling and doesn’t seem impressed. “Basically, once they saw what she was capable of, they were scrambling to add her to their team. With Nationals coming up in August, they were even discussing possibly sending her. With the right training, she could have a shot at the U.S Gymnastics Team!”







“Oh my God! That’s incredible!” Danny shouts, squeezing CJ’s hand hard because he can’t sublimate his excitement.





“That’s crazy,” CJ declares, fixing Danny, then the coach, with a serious, sobering stare. “Abbey is not a career gymnast. She’s just a normal teenager. Her gymnastics is just for fun and exercise.”





“But, honey, we had no idea she could possibly be good enough to make the national team,” Danny adds.





CJ tilts her head and purses her lips. “We don’t know that. These coaches just saw what happened to be a really good performance day for Abbey. That doesn’t make her a professional gymnast, and it certainly doesn’t mean she’s at the level to consider trying for Nationals. Besides, when we agreed to let her start competitive gymnastics we agreed that it would only be for sport, that she would only practice two nights a week and on Saturday so it wouldn’t interfere with school. ”





“I know, but if there are other gyms in the country who think she could challenge at Nationals, then shouldn’t we give it a shot?” Danny responds, his eyes wide with anticipation.





Val folds her hands in front of her on the desk. “Look, I know this is a lot to take in right now. Why don’t you take this home and think about it? Talk to Abbey and consider your options. If you’d like, I can put you in touch with the other coaches and work out the logistics.”





“That won’t be necessary,” CJ insists, standing up and securing her purse under her arm. “Abbey’s not leaving this gym. She’s been here for most of her life and she’s made some of her closest friendships here. There’s no need for her to leave now.”





The coach lowers her eyes and nods. “I’m sorry you feel that way, but I do understand. I would just hate to see Abbey waste her potential.”





“She won’t,” Danny replies, with a not-so-subtle glance at CJ.





“We have to get going. I’m sure Abbey will be through by now.” CJ turns around and heads for the office door.





Danny picks up the folder with one hand and reaches across the desk and offers Val his other hand. “Thank you for talking to us today, and thank you for referring Abbey to those clubs. I would love to see Abbey train and try out for the national team, but my wife has a lot of reservations. I’ll see if I can bring her around.”





“I hope that you do. Abbey’s very special. I haven’t trained a girl like her. Let me know if you need anything, Danny.” Val follows the father out of her office.





“Thanks, Val.”

* * *

“Honey, why won’t you even consider what a great opportunity this could be for Abbey?” Danny asks, chopping onions for the salad at the kitchen counter.





“Because it’s crazy,” CJ responds in a huff, beating the potatoes with the electric beater. “We’re not up rooting our entire lives and moving across the country so Abbey can train at a new gym for a career that I don’t want her to have. We’ve got jobs, jobs we like, and our fifteen year-old daughter isn’t going to have one.”





“But what if this is what she’s meant to do?” Danny puts out there, transferring the onions into the salad bowl and moving onto cutting up cucumbers.





CJ rolls her eyes, adding some pepper flakes to the potatoes. “She’s not. She’s going to finish high school like a normal kid and then go to college so she can get a stable, respectable career.”





“But if she was a professional gymnast she could get a scholarship for college and we wouldn’t have to worry about that,” Danny points out.





“We’ve been saving to send her to college since she was in my womb. Your argument is weak, Daniel,” CJ retorts with a heavy sigh, removing the chicken from the oven.





“Why don’t we talk to Abbey about it and see how she feels?” Danny suggests. “Maybe she really wants to go after this dream but we’ve been holding her back.” Danny dices tomatoes to include in the salad.







“Don’t mention anything to Abbey yet,” CJ pleads, reaching into the cupboards for dishes. “I’m no where near ready to consider this. Have you even thought about how this would affect PJ? Not that I’m considering moving, but if Abbey joined another gym in a different state and we had to completely uproot everything, that would be terrible for Pat. He’s finally got friends and activities and sports that he’s comfortable with. And he’s going to start high school in the fall and he’s already nervous about that. We can’t take away everything he’s familiar with.”





Danny nods his agreement with his wife. Perhaps he had been too quick to jump on the coach’s Abbey-Can-Be-an-Elite-Gymnast Bandwagon. He hadn’t thought through all the ramifications for their family. They have an Autistic son who would have a hard time coping with something as huge as moving across the country. “Yeah.”





“So you’ll cool it for a while?” CJ raises a brow in Danny’s direction.





“We’ll look at all the options and talk to all the coaches ourselves before we involve Abbey. We’ll do what we think is best for our whole family,” Danny assures CJ, albeit regretfully.





CJ bobs her head, relieved that she seems to have gotten Danny to remove his head from the clouds. “Good. Why don’t you go call the kids for dinner so we can get over to Donna and Josh’s party?”



* * *



“Can you grab the soda?” Abbey asks of her boyfriend as she deposits the popcorn from the popcorn maker into a large glass bowl.





Noah Lyman fetches the bottle of Diet Coke from the refrigerator and picks up the stack of plastic cups off the island counter. He had offered to help Abbey procure snacks for their siblings who are engaging in a Nintendo Wii marathon in the den so they could steal a couple kisses in the kitchen away from their nosy brothers and sister.





The telephone on the wall rings so Abbey automatically assumes that it is her father calling to check in on the kids and make sure they are behaving. When she doesn’t recognize the Lyman’s number from Caller ID, she lifts the phone off the receiver and brings it to her ear. “ Hello?”





“Hello. May I please speak to Mr. or Mrs. Concannon?” the caller across the line requests.





“They aren’t available right now. This is their daughter. Can I take a message?” Abbey offers, tossing some popcorn in her mouth as Noah leans against the counter.





“Is this Abigail?” The man on the phone inquires.





“Uh… yeah,” Abbey stutters, not sure how much information she should volunteer.





“Great. My name is Tom Yatesen and I’m with the All Olympia Gymnastics Centre in Los Angeles. Have you made your decision about what gym you’ll be joining? We’re eager to know.”





“What do you mean?” Abbey shakes her head.





“Well, when we talked to Val she said she would talk to you and your parents. She said you got a lot of offers from different gymnastics clubs and you’d have to consider your options. I completely understand that, by the way. You’re immensely talented and you’d be smart to spend some time evaluating the different gyms and what they can offer you, as well as their competitive prospects for Nationals. But if you joined our team, we could definitely send you to Nationals in August. You’d probably have to increase your training regiment; I know you’re not full-time now. But we would get you ready and you could make a big impact at Nationals…”Tom trails off and allows his statement to settle.





Abbey is beyond confused about what this man is telling her. “What? You want me to train at your gym? And there are other clubs that want me, too? How is that even possible? I’m not an elite gymnast. I just do this for fun. How…how did you even find out about me?”





“Your coach, Valerie, sent me a video of that invitational in December, of course. You had a top-scoring floor routine. You landed the full- in, back-out on the uneven bars. I was incredibly impressed, and I was not the only one. Some of my esteemed counterparts are trying to scoop you up. But Val told me today that your parents have some reservations about you competing at this level. Look, I understand that the training would be much more intense and it would probably require home-schooling, but I see your potential and I know that you can succeed at this level. If you have the dream, we can make it happen.”





Abbey has to take a deep breath as her eyes fall to the ground. “ My parents knew about this?”





“Yeah. Val talked to them about your potential and your future and everything. Look, if you want this and you want to sign with us, please don’t hesitate to contact me. I can help persuade your parents and allay any of their concerns,” the coach tells Abbey positively.





Swallowing hard, Abbey avoids sighing. “Thanks. I haven’t finished mulling over my options, but I’ll let you know what I decide.” Abbey wants to put out the impression that she’s in control and that she was never left out of the loop by her coach and parents.





“Okay. Well have a good evening and I’ll talk to you later. Please let your parents know I called and ask them to give me a call at the office.”





“I will. Thanks for calling.” Abbey ends the call and sets the phone back on the receiver.





“What was that all about?” Noah wonders as Abbey lifts her fingers to rub at her temple.





Abbey shrugs, shaking her head in disbelief. “Apparently my coach sent a video of me at a competition to private gyms and a bunch of them want me. Val told my parents that I had some kind of serious future in competitive gymnastics.”





Noah’s eyes dilate in surprise and pride and his lips form into a dimply grin. “ That’s awesome, babe.”





A pained expression plagues Abbey’s usually pretty face. “Yeah, well, apparently not. My parents obviously don’t agree because they didn’t even tell me about all this.”





Noah narrows his eyes. “ Really? Why wouldn’t they talk to you about it?”





She tries to shrug it off, but it’s obvious that Abbey is hurt. “Probably because they don’t think I’m good enough and can’t handle competing at the top level. My gymnastics has always been for fun and they don’t take me seriously. They don’t believe in me and don’t want me to pursue my dreams.”



Noah’s face falls in sympathy and he reaches out to touch Abbey’s shoulder. “ That’s not true. They love you and would probably support you in whatever you did.”





Abbey brushes her boyfriend off, taking the popcorn bowl and darting across the kitchen. “Whatever. It’s not like they’ll ever let me become a professional athlete anyway, so there’s no point in dwelling on it. Come on, let’s get this stuff in the other room.”





The teenage boy is left with the impression that Abbey doesn’t want to discuss the issue further and just wants to be left alone, so he resigns himself to the fact that he won’t be able to make her feel better now. He picks up the drinks and cups and traces Abbey’s steps to the den.



* * *



“Just wanted to say goodnight,” CJ whispers as she lets herself in through the open door to her daughter’s room later that night.





Abbey, clad in pink pajama pants and a purple hoodie, is combing her hair at her vanity dresser and doesn’t look up to greet her mother. “ Goodnight.”





“Did you guys have fun tonight?” CJ asks, padding across the room and perching herself on the end of Abbey’s bed. She pulls the end of Abbey’s quilt up and over her legs.





“Yeah,” Abbey responds unenthusiastically, setting her brush down.





“Donna threw another lovely block party,” CJ informs her daughter, trying to make conversation.





“That’s good,” replies Abbey lamely.





“Are you okay?” CJ inquires, finally fixing Abbey with a questioning stare.





Abbey whips around and looks CJ directly in the eyes. “ You got a phone call tonight from a Tom Yatesen of All Olympia. He was looking to discuss with you my future in gymnastics. In fact, he mentioned that there were many clubs that were looking to discuss my future with you and Dad. They wanted to talk about my future, and Val wanted to talk about my future, so I’m wondering why you didn’t want to talk about my future with me. Or is that because you didn’t even think I could have a future in gymnastics?”





Danny hovers hesitantly in the doorway, having overheard the conversation on his way to say goodnight to Abbey.





CJ immediately exhales, knowing she is in for a fight. “Honey, it’s not like that at all.”







Abbey tosses her hands up into the air dramatically. “Oh, really? Then why didn’t you tell me Val sent that video to other gyms and that she told you that she thought I could compete nationally? Why didn’t you tell me that all these clubs wanted me on their team?”





Danny steps into the room to intervene. “ Hey, lower your voice, Abigail. You don’t raise your voice to your mother like that. And we only found out about everything this morning at your practice. Val pulled us aside and said she wanted to discuss your prospects. This is all very new.”





“You just found out about it?” Abbey seeks confirmation from CJ.





CJ nods as Danny sits beside her on the bed and motions for Abbey to take a seat, as well.





“Well, were you ever gonna tell me about all this?” Abbey asks, perching in front of the parents.





CJ doesn’t like lying to her daughter, but she also wants to avoid hurting her. “We were going to figure out how we felt about this and how it could impact our family before we discussed it with you.”





“So, you were going to make the decision for me, without even considering my feelings?” Abbey asks, pointing her index and middle finger at her own chest.





CJ hesitantly decides to admit the truth. “No. But this is a huge, potentially life-altering decision and not for a fifteen year-old to make by herself. We wanted to consider all the options first. I mean, some of these gyms are half way across the country, and frankly we aren’t prepared to give up our entire lives here so you can train for a career that we’re not certain you should have. Professional athletes always face uncertainty and risk losing everything, and that’s just not the life we’ve imagined for you.”





Abbey throws herself off the bed in a huff. “But what if it’s what I wanted? You didn’t even think that this could be my dream! You don’t care what I want at all. You just want me to be this perfect little girl and excellent student and if I don’t fit your mold then you don’t like it. You don’t want me to be an elite gymnast because you think it’s beneath us, it’s beneath you. I thought you’d love me no matter what I did, but you’ll only love me if I fit your image of what you want in a daughter.” Abbey shakes her head at CJ, tears streaming down her eyes.





“Baby, that’s not true,” Danny states adamantly, standing up and wrapping one arm around Abbey’s shaking shoulders. “I’m so proud of everything you do, and not just the academic stuff. I’m always bragging about your gymnastics and showing off your medals. I know you can do anything you set your mind to, and I have no doubt you can compete at the national level.”





Wiping at her tears, Abbey quirks a little smile. “ I know you believe in me, Daddy. You’ve always been my biggest cheerleader.”





“I believe in you too, honey,” CJ insists firmly, tears pooling in her own eyes at the thought that her daughter thinks she doesn’t completely love and support her. “I completely respect your athletic talent and ability. But you’re fifteen years-old; you’re not having a career. I’m not moving Pat across the country and your father and I aren’t giving up the jobs that we love, that have supported our lifestyle for sixteen years, so you can go after this long-shot opportunity. You’re going to graduate high school like a normal kid and go to college like you’ve always wanted. Because you have a different dream of working for an NGO and protecting the environment and working for children’s rights. You talked about maybe someday working for the Hollis Foundation. Have you all of a sudden forgotten about those things? You can’t do that if you’re going to waste your life away jumping around on the beam.”





“But I could spend the next few years doing gymnastics and then go to college. Most gymnasts careers peak by the time their nineteen or twenty. I could go to college after that,” Abbey argues.





CJ shakes her head. “No, Abbey. You’re not training full-time for this. I want you in school five days a week, focusing on that.”





“You’re impossible! You’re don’t care at all.” Abbey cries, whipping around and running straight out of the room.





“Abbey!” CJ calls out, standing up and following Abbey down the hall.





Danny stops by grabbing her elbow and slowing her down. “ Honey, let her go. She needs to cool off. She’ll probably go brood outside on the patio or blare the TV really loud, but she’ll come around.”





CJ peers over the banister on the stairs down into the foyer as Abbey throws on her sneakers and lets herself out the front door. “ She ran outside! Where’s she going? It’s eleven o’clock. Danny, I don’t want her outside alone at eleven o’clock. Danny, go get her!”





“Okay, sweetie, it’ll be fine. I’ll go get her, but I think she’ll want some space.” Danny squeezes CJ’s hands before going to retrieve his shoes.



* * *





“Where’s Abbey?” CJ demands as Danny enters the foyer, sans Abigail. CJ had been pacing the foyer awaiting their return the last couple minutes.





Danny grimaces. “Haven’t seen her yet. I checked down the street to the left. I just thought I would check to see if she came home before I headed to the right. You know, she probably went to see Noah. I’ll head that way now.”





CJ’s face physically relaxes. “Oh, you’re right! I can’t believe I didn’t think of that. I’ll call there now.”





Just as CJ is about to reach for the living room phone on the coffee table, it rings as if on cue. CJ fumbles as she scrambles to bring the phone to her ear as quickly as possible. “ Hello?”





“Hey, CJ,” comes the familiar voice across the line.





CJ is practically elated to hear Donna’s voice and hopes that her friend is calling to inform her about her daughter’s whereabouts. “Donna, hi. Please, please, please tell me you have my daughter.”





Donna laughs lightly as she recognizes the overly worried tone in CJ’s voice. “I do, indeed. I guess there’s been a little drama.”





“Oh, Donna, we had a huge fight, “ CJ admits with strain. “Abbey’s coach approached all these professional gyms and they’re offering her a spot on their teams because they think she can compete at the national level. But I don’t want her to be a pro gymnast. I mean, it’s unstable and risky and could mean that I’d have to uproot my entire family. The bottom line is that she’s just a little girl and she’s not ready for the pressure of a full-time career. I want her to go school and have the experiences of a normal kid. Is that so wrong?”





“No, not at all,” Donna replies without hesitation. “ Of course you’re right. But Abbey feels like you don’t understand her, that you didn’t even ask her if she wanted to pursue this. Maybe you should have talked to her about this and made her feel like she had a say in the matter? She feels like you don’t value her as a person.”





CJ pauses, realizing that she’s done a great disservice to her daughter. “ Yeah. I really messed up. Thanks for giving her a safe place to crash and letting her talk it out. But it’s getting late so we’ll come pick her up.”





“No problem. She’s always welcome here and she knows that. She kinda wants to have some time away and she and Ella want to have a sleepover, so if it’s all right with you we can keep her here tonight and she can share Ella’s room.”





“Ah, no. That’s okay. I’d rather not. I know she’s mad and would rather be with Noah and Ella, but I want to have a chat with her and settle things before we go to sleep. Please understand,” CJ begs of her friend.





“Of course, that’s your call. But, why don’t you take your time? Come get her in like twenty minutes or half an hour? She needs some time to cool off,” Donna suggests.





“Yeah, okay,” CJ agrees reluctantly. The last thing she wants is her fifteen year-old spending the night at her boyfriend’s house after they’ve had a fight. Even though CJ realizes that there is no safer place she would rather have her daughter stay than at Josh and Donna’s, and she completely trusts the couple and their family, CJ desperately needs to reconcile with Abbey tonight.





“All right. So, we’ll see you later?” Donna confirms.





CJ sniffles, trying to hold back tears. “Yeah. Thanks, Donna. I’m sorry I’m being such a mean, controlling mother and won’t let her stay over, but I just have to see my daughter tonight. But I really do appreciate that you guys are always there for the kids, that Abbey feels safe to come to Noah and Ella and talk to you when she’s upset. I hope you know that.”





“I do, CJ. And I completely understand. I know that you want to talk things through with her yourself. I may be her friend, but I’m no substitute for you. She needs you right now, even if she doesn’t think so. She’ll come around. I know she will. She loves you more than anything in the world.”





CJ rolls her eyes, dabbing at a stray tear in the corner of her eye. “Not right now.”



* * *





“The important thing is that she’s safe,” Danny reiterates, wrapping an arm around CJ as they curl up on the living room couch.





“But she ran away because she’s mad at me. She’s never done that before. She hates me,” CJ cries, shaking her head.





“She doesn’t hate you,” Danny protests, drying CJ’s face with a tissue.





“I really messed up. We should have told her about everything like you wanted.” CJ is rethinking how she approached the news of the day.





“You were just trying to do what was best for our family,” Danny reminds her, trying in vain to comfort his wife.





CJ glances directly into Danny’s eyes, her own eyes watery. “Do you think she was right?”





“What do you mean?” Danny takes CJ’s hands and envelopes them in his own.





CJ swallows the lump in her throat. “Do you think I’m trying to mold her into an image of what I want her to be? Do you think I’m pushing unrealistic expectations upon her? Do I only want her to be a perfect student and go onto a reputable college? Is the reason I don’t want her to be a gymnast because I think it’s somehow an inferior career and beneath me?”





Danny blinks rapidly, trying to formulate an appropriate response. “ No. I think we’re both trying to give her the tools to be a well-rounded, self-sufficient person. You’re worried if she pursues gymnastics professionally that she’ll neglect school and won’t be able to get the education that’s a prerequisite for a sustainable career.”





CJ averts her eyes to the ground and inhales deeply. “I never thought I’d be one of those parents who pushed their dreams on their kid and forced them onto this little conveyor belt and made them come out like a factory product. I thought I would give my kids freedom and choice to do whatever they want.”





“You know what it might be?” Danny rubs CJ’s shoulder soothingly. “ We can’t put any pressure on Pat because of his social anxiety. We hardly have any expectations for him except that he can some day be independent and happy. So maybe we’ve got all these great dreams for Abbey about her going to the Ivey League and then saving the world. But is that so wrong? I don’t think so. We’re not so different than any other parents. I don’t think you’re pushing Abbey onto a cookie-cutter path. When the time comes, we’ll let her choose which college to attend and which jobs to take.”





“But just not gymnastics?” CJ seeks confirmation, sighing just a little.





* * *



“Hey, Danny. Come on in,” Josh offers, opening the front door for his friend later that night.





“Thanks, Josh. Sorry for all this drama. My girl’s keeping you guys up really late.” Danny steps into the foyer as Josh closes the door behind him.





Josh laughs it off lightly. “It’s not a problem. The kids are in the den. Hey, guys. Danny’s here.”





Donna comes in through the kitchen and offers Danny a sympathetic half-smile. “Hey, Danny.”





“Thanks for keeping her, Donna. I’m sorry it’s prolonged your evening,” Danny replies, shoving his hands in his jacket pockets.





“It’s totally fine, Danny. We don’t mind at all,” Donna reassures him as the kids come in through the den.





“How about we let these guys get some sleep?” Danny suggests, reaching forward to envelope his daughter in a hug.





Abbey half-frowns as she extricates herself from Danny’s hold. “ ‘Kay.”





“Good night. Call me in the morning,” Noah requests, hugging Abbey soundly.





Ella steps to the side and hugs Abbey, as well. “Night. Hope you feel better.”





“Thanks, Donna, Josh. I’m sorry I came over so late and kept you all up.” Abbey offers Donna a grateful hug.





“No, problem, sweetie. You’re welcome anytime. I love you and we’ll talk tomorrow, okay?” Donna runs a hand over Abbey’s reddish brown curls.





Danny puts a hand on Abbey’s shoulder and walks them out the door. “ Thanks, guys. Talk to you, tomorrow.”





“Bye,” Josh calls as Danny and Abbey descend the porch.





When they reach the sidewalk, Abbey tilts her head to look at her father. “ Why couldn’t I stay?”





“Because we have some things to work out. Your mother wants to talk and end this disagreement,” Danny replies, moving his hand to hold his daughter’s hand.





“Well I don’t want to talk to her,” Abbey proclaims. “She doesn’t believe in me and doesn’t want me to pursue my dreams, not like you do. I know you believe in me.”





“Okay, slow down. Let’s get a couple things straight.” Danny stops them squarely in the middle of the sidewalk. “Your mom loves you more than anything, and she supports everything you do, including your gymnastics. It’s hasn’t just been me there cheering you on these last ten years, okay? It really hurt her when you said you didn’t think she supported you. It breaks her heart because you and your brother have been her world for the last fifteen years. You can be upset with your mother, but don’t ever, ever, ever think for a second that she doesn’t love you or support you. So, when we go in there, you’re gonna lose your attitude and remember that that is the incredible woman who has raised you your entire life and who would give her life for you, and you will respect her. Do you understand?”





Chastened, Abbey nods her obedience. “ Yes.”





Danny resumes walking down the street toward their house. “And next time you’re upset and need some fresh air and want to go to your boyfriend’s house, you’ll tell us where you’re going so I don’t have to run around the neighbourhood looking for you and you don’t have us worrying, okay?”





“Yeah,” Abbey replies meekly.

* * *



Danny raps lightly on the door to his bedroom before letting himself in, Abbey close in toe.





CJ is in the en-suite bathroom and enters the bedroom when she hears them enter. She has her favourite teal-coloured fluffy robe pulled over her pajamas and has just finished brushing her teeth. “Hey.”





Abbey awkwardly shifts on the balls of her feet. “ I’m sorry I took off and you were worried about me. I wanted to go see Noah. I should have told you where I was going. It won’t happen again.”





CJ nods curtly, folding her arms across her chest. “Good, because I was worried.”





Abbey takes in a deep breath. “And I’m sorry I stormed off like that. I know it was really immature. I just…I was upset because I felt like you made this decision for me and didn’t even consider my feelings and talk to me about it.”





Sighing, CJ pads over to the bed and seats herself on the end of the bed. She pats the blankets and motions for Abbey to take a seat. “Honey, I’m sorry we didn’t talk to you immediately about our discussion with your coach. We were going to tell you about it. But you have to understand how worried I was about the prospect of us picking up and moving across the country so you could train professionally. The chances of making it to the top are so slim and only the absolute best girls get to win at Nationals and go onto international competition. I would just hate the thought of you spending all your energy training for something, only to have your hopes and dreams dashed in the end.”



Sitting between her parents on the end of the bed, Abbey nods. “ I know. But what if I still stayed in school and just trained in L.A? I could join that All Olympia and just try to make it this year at Nationals? We wouldn’t have to move and nothing would really have to change, but then I could at least see if I was capable of competing at the top level.”



CJ shares a look with Danny, trying to gauge his opinion on Abbey’s idea. Danny definitely seems in favour. “I don’t know. If you wanted to train there, it would still be a huge adjustment. That’s a much more professional gym. You would be expected to increase your time at the gym and I have a feeling it would interfere with your school work. You would certainly have to give up the gymnastics team at school, as well as the basketball team and the environment club and Model U.N. You wouldn’t have much time left over to spend with Noah.”



Abbey’s face registers alarm. “I wouldn’t have to break up with him, would I?”



CJ shrugs. “The girls at the gym that are training for Nationals and have dreams for the Olympics, they don’t have boyfriends or go to high school or participate in clubs. If this is what you want, you’d have to give up an awful lot.”



Abbey contemplates what her life might be like if she pursued this dream. “I want to see where I can go with this. Can I please, please join the A.O.G.C?”



CJ steals another glance at Danny, who can barely contain a smile of approval. “You sure you know what you’re getting into? You’re positive this is your dream? You know what you’re willing to give up?”



“Yes,” Abbey nods with conviction. “ I’d give it all up, being a normal teenager and everything, except Noah. I’m not willing to forsake our relationship.”



CJ inhales and lets out a prolonged sigh. She isn’t certain that she wants her daughter to train professionally, but Abbey wants it so much and she wants to do everything she can to make her daughter’s dreams come true. “All right, then we’ll talk to the coach at this L.A club. But, under no circumstances are you leaving high school. I don’t care how much they push you to commit to the gym and want you home -schooled, you will stay at Abernathy. If your grades start to suffer, then you’ll have to cut back your training. You’re not forsaking your academic future, because you’ve only got maybe five peak years for gymnastics, but your academic career will last a lifetime. So, this is a two-sided deal, okay? We’ll let you go to this gym if you promise to stay focused on school, as well. If you don’t hold up on your end of the deal, then you won’t be able to continue with gymnastics. Does that seem fair?”





Abbey grins, just grateful that her mom is going to permit her to strive for the top. “ Yes, of course. Thank you, Mom!” The girl flings her arms around CJ’s neck and clings tightly.



“Is that okay, Danny?” CJ seeks confirmation from Danny, realizing they hadn’t discussed the plan and agreed on their position together.





“Yeah, that’s completely fair,” Danny vocalizes his consent and joins in the women’s hug. “Oh, sweetpea, I’m so proud of you. I know you can do this. But I need to echo your mom’s words. Your mom and I invested in our futures when we were young by getting a good education. That’s how we ended up with our great careers that are able to pay for what I am sure is going to be an incredibly expensive club for you to practice your gymnastics in. So you need to continue to excel in school so that when you retire from gymnastics you’ll always have a stable career waiting.”





“I will,” Abbey promises, hugging Danny soundly. “Thank you. Can we call Tom Yatesen tomorrow?”



CJ exhales, running a hand over Abbey’s pony-tail. “Yeah, we’ll set up a meeting and see what kind of plans he has for you. And we’ll make it perfectly clear that you are to remain committed to your school work.” CJ can’t help but shake her head. To her, it seems like just yesterday she was admonishing her toddler for doing cart-wheels in the kitchen, and now her teenager is embarking on a potential career. It scares CJ to think of Abbey having any serious future in professional athletics, her daughter perhaps getting her hopes up only to get injured or have some other misfortune befall her and lose everything at the last minute. She tells herself that it’s just temporary, that as soon as Abbey gets a taste of elite gymnastics she will realize that she is not cut out for it and she’ll want to return to her comfortable home club. At the very least, she knows that she and Danny won’t permit their daughter to waste her brain away so that when the time comes, she will be able to choose from a variety of colleges and embark on a more long-term career. “God, I’m gonna miss Val.”







Abbey grimaces, letting go of Danny. “Oh, yeah, me too. I’m gonna miss my friends at the gym, too. I’m used to seeing them all the time. I guess I won’t have a lot of time for them anymore.”





“You’ll make new friends at your new gym,” Danny offers as a way to comfort his daughter.





“Unless they’re mean and super-competitive. Val says that the elite girls can be really catty,” Abbey adds, frowning.





“Don’t worry about that now, Princess. Focus on the positive. This is an exciting new phase.” Danny squeezes Abbey’s arm soothingly.





“Yeah, you’re right. Well, it’s been a long day so I’m going to go to bed.” Abbey jumps off the bed.





Danny steps down off the bed. “Goodnight, sweetie. I love you, baby.” Danny plants a kiss to his little girl’s crown.





“Love you, too, Daddy.” Abbey kisses Danny’s cheek before turning to CJ. “I’m sorry for upsetting you, Mom. I know you love and support me, I was just so upset and not thinking clearly. I didn’t mean to hurt you like that.”





CJ slides off the bed to hug her daughter. “I never, ever want you to think for a second that I don’t love and support you. I’m sorry that you ever doubted that. I will be happy with whatever career you want, so long as you can be happy, satisfied, self-sufficient, and relatively stable. But the choice is up to you. You don’t have to do something just because it’s what I want. We’ve always encouraged you to be your own person. You don’t have to be my protégé, you don’t have to be perfect. I will love you no matter what you, even if you fail. Do you understand?”



Abbey squeezes her mother’s shoulders. “ Yep. Thanks, Mom.”





CJ closes her eyes, just glad that she was able to get through to her daughter and make her realize that a mother’s love is unconditional. With everything the young girl is about to embark upon, she ‘ll need to know that her parents will always be proud of her.

Title: I Will Remember You

Author: Laura H

Disclaimer: If I married Aaron Sorkin, would I own the rights to The West Wing and the characters? It’s an intriguing thought, even if he is over twice my age. But, oh, that brilliant mind!

Rating: PG

Synopsis: CJ’s father falls ill.

Author’s Notes: Can you believe I’ve finally got a chapter out? In my defence, it’s a super long chapter and took on a life of it’s own. Sorry for the delay. I worked on this during the Christmas holidays and picked a way at it a bit over the last couple weeks. Maybe I’ll get a chance to write again during my reading week break from classes, but I can’t promise anything. Stupid school and real life take precedence.

When I was listening to Sarah’s song, I thought it would be perfect for CJ’s relationship with her father after he developed Alzheimer’s . I don’t profess to know anything about the field of medicine, politics is really my thing. So, please excuse all inaccuracies.





Danny makes his way through the foyer and into the kitchen, dodging the cardboard boxes, tarps and paint cans littering the hallway and most of the rooms of the main floor of the house. He sets the cloth bag of groceries down on the island counter and goes in search of his fiancée. When he had left to go procure food for dinner from the super-market, CJ had been priming the den for its much -needed makeover. Since they had moved to Santa Monica last month, they had been renovating their house to their own tastes and preparing their new home for guests. Danny climbs the staircase to the second floor to discover CJ perching on the bed in a stoic reverie. He can deduce immediately that something is wrong.



“Honey?” Danny pads slowly across the hardwood floor to sit next to CJ on the King-sized bed, and takes her hand.





With a single tear cascading down her cheek, CJ inhales sharply. “ Art just called. My father had a stroke last night.”



“Oh, no. Sweetheart, I’m so sorry. Was it bad?” Danny takes his free hand and wraps his arm around CJ’s back in comfort. CJ’s plaid button-down shirt is stained with paint, the product of their re-decorating, and her hair is pulled back into a loose pony-tail.



“It doesn’t look good,” CJ responds with a sniffle, shaking her head in disbelief.



Danny drops a kiss to CJ’s crown in a comforting gesture. “Okay, well why don’t I call the airline and get us on the next flight to Dayton?”



CJ appraises Danny’s expression carefully. He hadn’t even thought twice before stating that he would accompany her. “You want to come?”



Danny shrugs easily. “ Of course. I’m your fiancé. I want to come with you so I can be there for whatever you and your family need.”



“But you’ve never met my family,” CJ reminds him slowly. CJ had wanted to introduce Danny to her father, brothers and niece since they got engaged three weeks ago, but she and Danny had been so busy with the house that they weren’t prepared to entertain house guests and didn’t have the time to fly out East.



Danny grimaces and sighs lightly. “ I know. And it couldn’t be under worse circumstances. But, I feel like I should be there for you.”



CJ nods mutely. She had known that it would be awkward for Danny to meet her family (it having been so long since she brought a man home), but now he would have to become acquainted with them while they were dealing with her father’s stroke. She supposes that engaged couples are supportive of one another during times of crisis.

* * *

“Aunt CJ!” Hogan Cregg flails her arms in attempt to flag down her aunt at the airport.



Glancing up, CJ recognizes her grown niece and waves in response. She continues to make her way toward the exit, Danny following closely with their luggage. “Hey, sweetie. How are you?” CJ hugs the younger woman when Hogan rushes up to greet her.



“I’m good. It’s so nice to see you again. I mean, it’s terrible that Grandpa is so sick, but I’m glad to see you again.” The twenty-one year old blonde girl takes CJ’s carry-on bag.



“Oh, I know, honey. I wish I had been around more,” CJ frowns while following Hogan out towards the parking lot.



“You must be Danny,” Hogan states presumptuously as she extends her hand to the red-headed man rolling the suitcases.



“Oh, sorry. I forgot…”CJ shakes her head at her lack of social grace. She had been so focused on getting to the hospital in Dayton that she forgot to introduce her fiancé and niece.



Danny smiles warmly as he shakes the younger woman’s hand. “ Yes. It’s nice to finally meet you, Hogan. CJ has bragged to me about all your accomplishments.”



Hogan rolls her eyes in a self-deprecating manner. “ Yeah, sure. I didn’t even know you existed before January.” Hogan fixes her aunt with a playfully annoyed look.



CJ inhales sharply, feeling guilty for not talking to her family about her relationship with Danny prior to after the new year. She hadn’t known how serious it would get until she and Danny actually discussed their future, at which point she finally disclosed to her niece that she was dating a man. “ Honey, I’m sorry, but I told you…”



Hogan waves her off dismissively. “It’s fine. I’m just giving you a hard time. Danny, welcome to life with the Cregg’s. You better buckle up because the road is rough.”



Danny chuckles, instantly becoming comfortable with CJ’s outgoing and off-beat niece. “Thanks for the warning, but I think I can tough it out. I know it seems like this thing with CJ and me is very new, but I’ve actually been vying for your aunt’s attention for over eight years. I’ve got a pretty good indication of what I’m getting myself into.”



Hogan laughs airily. “Good. Because Aunt CJ is a lot of work.”



“Hey,” CJ protests with a half-hearted smile.



“Well, thank you for picking us up,” Danny states as way of expressing his gratitude.



“No problem. It made more sense for me to come get you instead of you grabbing a cab.” Hogan leads the way through the parking lot to her father’s car.



“How’s your grandfather?” CJ asks of Hogan, finally turning serious.



Sighing heavily, Hogan opens the trunk of the car for Danny to secure the luggage. “He doesn’t look good. He’s paralyzed on the left side of his body, and it’s difficult for him to speak properly. The doctors said the stroke did a lot of brain damage.”



CJ envelopes her niece in a tight embrace, partly to comfort the girl and partly to seek her own comfort in connecting with her family. “We’ll just have to get him better.”



Nodding, Hogan steps back. “Yeah. Dad’s been there since the nursing home called in the middle of the night. I figured you’d want to go to the hospital, but do you want to stop anywhere first?” Hogan locates her keys in her purse.



CJ shakes her head firmly. “ No, I just want to see him. Let’s go straight to the hospital.”



“Okay,” Hogan consents, lowering herself into the driver’s seat as CJ takes the passenger seat and Danny climbs into the back seat of the car.

* * *



Hogan leads her small group down the corridors of the hospital to the wing where Talmadge Cregg is recovering. She spots her father and uncle sitting in the waiting room and directs CJ and Danny through the lobby.



Arthur Cregg stands up in preparation to greet his younger sister, a tense smile forming on his wrinkled mouth. “I’m glad you made it.” The last time he had seen his sister, her hair had been lighter and shorter, and her face had a prominent look of permanent fatigue about it. Now, she certainly looks less stressed, and it even looks like the light has returned to her eyes and some of the fine lines around her eyes have smoothed. He has to conclude that life in California must be doing her some good in the short amount of time she has been living there.



CJ reaches forward to hug her eldest brother and notices how remarkably similar he is to her father. Both men’s height soared well over six feet, and that had always comforted her about her family. Like his father, Art Cregg has thinning grey hair and a permanent look of deep reflection upon his face. “Of course. How’s he doing?”



“Not great. The stroke caused a lot of damage,” Art answers seriously.



CJ moves on to embrace her other brother, Donnie, who is significantly shorter than the older Cregg son and has a thicker, more muscular toned body after years working as a construction worker and contractor. Donnie hadn’t acquired the same aptitude for academia that his father, brother and younger sister had. He finds it difficult to keep up with any complicated discussions between his family members. CJ turns around to look quickly at Danny standing supportively behind her. “Before I forget, this is Danny. He’s…”CJ pauses momentarily, realizing just how awkward it is to introduce Danny as her fiancé when he hadn’t met her family. “He’s my fiancé. Danny, my brothers Art and Donnie.”



Danny offers both men a firm handshake and makes a concerted effort to look them both directly in the eyes. He wants them to know how much he loves and respects their sister. “It’s good to meet you. I’m so sorry to hear about your father’s stroke. But from what CJ has told me about her father, he is a strong man and hopefully he will be able to make a full recovery.”



Art appraises the younger man with caution. It had probably been over two decades since his baby sister had brought home a man she was dating to meet the family, and he is wary of the man she had agreed to marry so quickly after starting a relationship with him. “Yes, that’s what we’re hoping.”



* * *

CJ had left Danny in the waiting room while she went to check on her father. She wanted to be alone when she saw her father for the first time. It would give her an opportunity to gauge his mental acuity and determine if he was ready to meet her fiancé. When she spots her father lying lifelessly in the hospital bed with a white sheet covering his frail body, she has to inhale sharply and compose herself. She’s not accustom to the sight of tubes and wires weaving in and out of his skin, and it’s very disarming. CJ slowly pads across the room toward the bed, the soft beeping from the machines echoing around the enclosed space. That sterile, clean and stale scent unique to hospitals has an instantaneous effect of sending CJ’s memories back to the last days of her mother’s battle with leukemia. CJ lowers herself onto the plastic chair next to the bed, hoping she will be able to calm her nerves by sitting. She has to swallow hard several times, but she reaches out to lay her right hand tentatively over her father’s right hand resting on the other side of the bed. She knew he would not feel her touch on his left hand.



Talmadge’s eyes flicker open at the foreign sensation on his hand.



“Hey, there.” CJ whispers hoarsely, forcibly plastering a little smile on her face.



“Jeannie?” Talmadge blinks rapidly, trying to process the sight in front of him.



“No, Daddy. It’s me, Claudia. Mom’s not with us anymore, remember?” CJ is used to her father calling her by the pet named he had used for his wife, Jean. Since his memory began to fade several years prior, he often assumed she was her mother, and that his daughter was still a small child.



Talmadge inhales sharply and shakes his head in a fluster. “Of course, of course… I know that… I know… you’re Claudia.”



CJ instantly notices the slur in his accent and the trouble he is having forming sentences, and her heart aches. The formerly brilliant mathematician has been reduced to an incoherent, senile old man. “How are you feeling?”



“Very old,” Talmadge admits with a pronounced sigh.



CJ lets out her own large exhale.“Daddy, I am so sorry I wasn’t there. I should have been there for you more. The last eight years I hardly had the time to leave Washington, and now I’ve gone and moved across the country and I wasn’t there when you probably needed me most.”



“You’re in…Santa Monica now?” Talmadge guesses, racking his fragmented memory for the knowledge of where his daughter is living. He can vaguely recall a conversation they had over the phone where she explained what she was doing in California and where she was currently working.



CJ’s lips curl into a little smile at the fact that her father’s stroke hadn’t killed that particular tidbit of memory. “Yes, that’s right! I’m developing the Hollis Foundation now.”



Talmadge nods painfully. “You got an apartment there?”



“Uh, no. I actually have a house, a nice house, with my fiancé.” CJ hesitantly adds that last detail, not sure if her father recalls her telling him about Danny.



“You’re… getting married?” Talmadge inquires in surprise, his brows rising. For some reason, he hadn’t known that.



CJ licks her lips and nods. “Yes. We got engaged a couple weeks ago and we’re planning the wedding for June.”



“You and Toby?” Talmadge can’t piece together all the remnants of memories floating around in his frail mind.



CJ is surprised that her father could remember Toby. “No, Daddy. It’s Danny. Do you happen to remember the Washington Post reporter that worked on the Press Corp. a few years ago? Well, it’s him. Danny Concannon.”



Talmadge fixes his daughter with a confused stare. “ Concannon? Was he the one…the one…the one who wrote about the President’s…the President’s involvement in the assassination of..of…of..that…Shareef?”



CJ’s jaw drops in shock. Her father couldn’t recall the fact that she was getting married, but he could remember a story Danny wrote four years ago? “Uh, yeah. Yeah, that’s him.”



“You’re marrying a reporter?” Talmadge confirms in bewilderment.



CJ almost raises her voice in indignation. Her father might be lying in a hospital bed and recovering from a stroke, but she doesn’t like the tone of disapproval in his voice. She feels the need to defend Danny, although she knows it’s futile to fight with her father as he lies in a hospital bed. “No, Danny’s not a reporter anymore. He’s writing President Bartlet’s biography now and finishing his doctorate so he can teach college.”



Talmadge’s lips purse tightly. “I didn’t mean…I didn’t mean it as a bad thing. I was…I was just not expecting that. He was…he was a good…a good journalist.” Talmadge is growing frustrated with his inability to sort his thoughts in a logical temporality. He finds himself recalling only bits and pieces of years’ worth of events.



CJ closes her eyes briefly, overwhelmed with dealing with her father. “Look, I didn’t mean to disturb you. You’re so tired and I don’t want to aggravate you. I think I’ll just go track down your doctors and have a chat with them.”



“Am I going to get to meet this…this Danny fellow?” Talmadge asks, looking off toward a back wall.



CJ’s facial expression relaxes. “If you’re up to it. He’s in the waiting room with Art, Donnie and Hogan.”



“He came down with you?” The elderly man deduces.



“Yes,” CJ replies softly.



Talmadge likes that the man his daughter has agreed to marry was willing to fly across the country to be with her and her family.



With a sigh, CJ bends over her father’s torso and kisses his cool temple. “Okay, you just relax. I’ll be back in a little while. I’m going to talk to the doctors. You flag down the nurse if you need me.”

* * *

“The doctors said it could be a while before it would be safe to fly him to a home in Los Angeles,” Danny points out, handing CJ a turkey sandwich from the cafeteria as they resume seats in the hospital waiting room. He unwraps his own sandwich and takes a bite. The head neurologist had just had a detailed conversation with the family and went over the treatment and prognosis. The stroke had done significant damage, but with therapy they expected to bring Talmadge almost back to his previous status.



CJ shakes her head and rubs at her temple, setting her food in her lap, not really hungry anyway. “It doesn’t matter. I already talked to him in January about moving to a nursing home in California so I could visit him regularly and he wouldn’t have anything of it. I even suggested Napa because he has extended family and lots of friends there, but he adamantly asserted that he wouldn’t leave Dayton. He refuses to leave the city and sell the house he had with my mother. Plus, he said Art and Donnie spend plenty of time at his nursing home, but I’m sure that isn’t the case. I just wish I was around more. Maybe, maybe I should move back and look after him and…” CJ’s eyes begin to brim with tears again at the guilt she feels for leaving her father to rot in the nursing home in Ohio while she was working in Washington and then building her new life in Santa Monica. She should have moved back to Dayton to take care of her aging father.

Danny has come to recognize that look on CJ’s face as the one she has when she is being too hard on herself and putting unrealistic expectations on herself. He reaches one arm around to wrap around her shoulder. “ Honey, stop. Stop berating yourself. There’s nothing you could have done to prevent this stroke and there’s nothing you can really do now. If you want, we can stay in Dayton for his recovery for as long as you like. But you’ve got an important new job waiting in Los Angeles and you can’t abandon that to be your father’s nurse. You’ve got no reason to feel bad about that. When you were in there with your father, Art and Donnie were telling me about what it was like when you guys were growing up. They told me that when your mother died when you were thirteen, you took over managing the household. Even though your father was brilliant, he didn’t know how to raise children and manage the schedule and cook and do laundry and all that stuff. You had to learn how to do all that stuff. You helped raise your older brothers, and you helped teach your father how to be a better parent. I know sometimes you don’t think you do enough for your family, but I know that’s not true. You held your family together. You still do. But you need to do things for yourself. You need our new life in California. We’re creating a new family together.” Danny places a kiss to CJ’s crown, closing his eyes as he wills away the pain of losing the tiny little embryo they had conceived only a few months prior. They had discussed it at length, and he and CJ had decided that once her body had properly healed, they would try again to conceive a baby, and hopefully this time bring it to term.



CJ curls into Danny, grateful for his presence throughout this whole mess.



“Aunt CJ, I found a …Oh, sorry.” Hogan stops short of the bench of chairs in the waiting room at the sight of her aunt and Danny holding each other intimately, her father and Donnie in close toe behind her.



CJ immediately sits up straighter, blushing slightly as Danny still has his arm around her shoulder and hasn’t released his hold on her hands. “Ahh, yes, honey?”



“Sorry, I just…I found that lemon iced tea you wanted in one of the vending machines.” Hogan steps forward and hands CJ the bottle while Art and Donnie take seats across from Danny and CJ.



“Thank you, sweetie,” CJ replies, reluctantly freeing her hands from Danny’s soothing touch.



“I think I’m going to head home. I’ve got to manage the construction site early tomorrow morning,” Donnie announces quietly. He had taken the day off to be at the hospital, but he had committed to a contract and he didn’t want to lose too much time on the job. “I’ll drop by in the afternoon, but can one of you keep me updated throughout the day if there’s any change in Dad’s status?”



“Of course, of course,” CJ nods. She stands up to envelope her brother in a sound hug. “ Have a good night and we’ll see you tomorrow.”



Danny reaches out to shake the man’s hand again, telling Donnie that it was nice to meet him. After saying his goodbyes and checking in on his father, Donnie leaves the hospital for the night.



Hogan dips her plastic spoon into her carton of yogurt. “Aunt CJ, I made up your old room in the house if you wanted to stay with us. I didn’t know if you and Danny would want to stay with Dad and I, or if you would stay at a hotel.” When they had moved Talmadge to a nursing home, he had insisted that the home not be sold as long as he was living. So, instead of paying two mortgages plus his father’s nursing home fees, Art had decided to move into his old childhood home and sell his own house.



CJ shares a quick glance with Danny, who shrugs to say that it is completely up to her as to where they should sleep tonight. It had been so long since she had spent time in Dayton with her brother and niece, so CJ decides that it would be a great opportunity to continue to catch up with them if they stayed at the house with her family. “Actually, I think it would nice if we could chat some more. I think we’ll stay at the house tonight.”



“Then you should probably put some linen on the bed in the guest room for Danny,” Art suggests with a cocked brow. He has been trying to assess, in the couple hours he has known the man, the kind of character Danny possess and whether he is worthy of his sister’s heart. From the moment of affection he had witnessed between the two of them, he recognized that they obviously cared about each other a lot, but Art wants to be certain that Danny is truly right for CJ. His younger sister had waited a lifetime to really commit herself to one man, to get married and have a family, and when she did, Art wanted it to be everything she had ever wanted it to be.



Hogan rolls her eyes at her father’s prudishness. “Don’t be ridiculous, Dad. They’re engaged.”



Danny awkwardly tries to avoid eye contact while CJ chuckles lightly.



“Anyway, I think I’ll take Danny in to meet Daddy before he gets too tired. Then we can head home and get a few hours of sleep.” CJ turns to glance at her fiancé. “You ready?”



Danny had been preparing for this since last night when CJ had gotten the call from Art. He was set to meet CJ’s father. “Yes, let’s go.” Danny follows CJ’s lead as she directs them down the hallway.



“Now, his memory is very fragmented so he may repeat questions or forget things or…”CJ rambles, fidgeting her fingers.



“Sweetheart, I understand that he has Alzheimer’s and just had a stroke,” Danny reassures her, squeezing her shoulder lightly.



CJ pauses briefly outside the doorway to her father’s ER room. “All right. Just follow my lead.” She slowly pads across the room, holding Danny’s hand as he steps up behind her. The head of the hospital bed is against the right wall of the room, and CJ and Danny stand beside the left side of the bed.



Talmadge is lying limply with his eyes closed so CJ softly calls for him to get his attention. “I’m sorry, Daddy. It’s getting late so we were going to go back to the house to get a few hours sleep. The nurses and doctors are going to check in on you through the night. Is it okay if we head back to the house?”



Licking his dry lips, Talmadge nods painfully. “Yes, dear…that’s fine. You need…sleep. I need…sleep.”



“Okay, I won’t bother you for too long, then,” CJ promises, taking her father’s right hand and squeezing it gently while she perches on a plastic chair next to the bed. “I just wanted to introduce you to Danny. Do you remember I told you that my fiancé came with me?”



The elderly man glances toward the younger man standing behind his daughter and stares intently.



“I’m glad to finally get the opportunity to meet you, sir, although I am sorry that it has to be under these circumstances.” Danny nods curtly in the direction of the older man and purses his lips in a respectful expression. He can’t exactly reach out and shake the other man’s hand like he would like to. “When you’re feeling better, I would like to sit down and tell you a little about myself and how I’ve come to know and love CJ. But for now, suffice it to say that I’m completely in love with your daughter and we’ve been friends for the better part of eight years. I can’t wait to marry her and start the next part of our journey together.”

Warmly smiling, CJ takes Danny’s hand with her own free hand.



“She’s a… very independent woman,” Talmadge points out firmly. “ That’s the way… her mama… and I… raised her. She’s not the… kind of woman… who’s gonna…darn your socks…and put her…life and career and friends… aside…just because…she’s married.” Talmadge is trying to tell this fiance of his daughter’s that he doesn’t want CJ to throw away all her hard-work for the sake of some man, but he’s having a really difficult time thinking.



Danny’s brows immediately rise and he shakes his furiously. “ No, no, of course not. I would never want that. I completely respect and admire CJ’s career. I love that she is passionate and dedicated to her work. I love her the way she is. And actually, I’m excited about CJ’s new role with the Hollis Foundation.”



“And we’re working on getting me better at relationships,’ CJ admits with a self-deprecating smile.



“And we’re making remarkable progress,” Danny responds honestly with a loving grin.



“Excuse me, Ms. Cregg?” A short, black-haired nurse pokes her head into the room. “Dr. Gilbert has that list of medications and treatments that you requested to see.”



CJ glances toward the door. “ Oh, yes. Thank you.” CJ gives Danny an apologetic look. “I just have to review this. I’ll be right back.” CJ lightly squeezes her father’s hand. “ Daddy, I’m just going with the nurse for a minute. Is that all right?”



When Talmadge doesn’t protest, CJ exists, leaving Danny in awkward silence with CJ’s ill father. After listening to the rhythmic beeping of the machines surrounding the hospital bed, Danny decides that despite the older man’s current handicap, he wants to try to assure him that his daughter is in good hands.



Danny leans forward in his plastic chair and clears his throat. “Sir, from the impression I got from CJ and your sons, you’re very protective of your daughter and you only want what’s best for her. I’m sure you worry about her and were concerned when she told you she was engaged to some man you hadn’t met. But I want you to know that I love CJ more than anything in the world. We’ve known each other a very long time and I’ve always been serious about having a relationship with her. I’m completely committed to our relationship and I will be entirely faithful to our marriage.”



Talmadge sighs heavily. He wants to believe the younger man who looks at his daughter like she’s the only woman he’s ever laid eyes on. “You can’t understand…what it’s like to have that baby girl…in your arms…and worry constantly about her…It doesn’t change…just because she’s grown up.”



Danny looks the elderly man directly in the eyes, needing him to recognize his seriousness. “Well, someday I hope to have a baby that I will love and protect as well as you did for CJ and your sons all those years.”



“You want a baby? Does my daughter know that?” He doesn’t want this man pressuring his daughter into getting married and becoming a stay-at-home mom when she has worked so hard for her independent life and successful career.



“Yes,” Danny responds honestly and without a missing a beat. “And she’d like to have a family, too. We’ve recently reassessed our priorities.”



“Claudia is… a career woman,” Talmadge reminds the younger man sternly.



“Yes, and she will always have that part of her life,” Danny reassures his fiancés father. “ But she’s been burning herself out these last eight years, working sixteen, eighteen hours a day at the White House. She doesn’t want that anymore. She can’t do that any more. She wants balance in her life now. So she’s heading Franklin Hollis’ foundation, and that will be an incredibly rewarding and challenging professional endeavor, but she will have a lot more flexibility in that line of work. That will allow us to foster a loving and healthy marriage, and devote time to raising the child we’re praying to have some day. I promise you, sir, I am prepared to do everything I can, including staying at home with the baby if that is what CJ desires, so that CJ can always pursue her dreams.”



Talmadge tries in vain to process everything that Danny is telling him. Despite the fact that he wants to be protective of his daughter by being critical of her fiancé, he finds himself easily believing and trusting Danny. Maybe he’s just physically and mentally exhausted, but maybe this guy is a truly good, decent man.



“I’m sorry about that,” CJ exclaims as she reenters the room and retraces her steps back over to the bed.



Danny affectionately places his hand over CJ’s once she seats herself on a chair next to the bed.



“Danny says…you might have a baby?” Talmadge states as way of a question.



Inhaling and sharing a shaky smile with Danny, CJ nods to her father. She doesn’t know what Danny told him, and she doesn’t know how well her father would react to the fact that she wants to have children. “Well, we would like to have a child, but we don’t know if it’s possible given our ages and everything.”



Talmadge’s lips curl into a lopsided grin. “It’d be nice to…have another grandchild.”



CJ physically relaxes at the emotion in her father’s tone and the little twinkle in his otherwise dull eyes. Her father not only entirely recognizes her, but almost seems to approve of the new life she has going for herself. He hadn’t complained about her moving to California, and so far he had been agreeable towards Danny. Furthermore, he seemed to approve of her change in priorities and was actually looking forward to her possibly having a family. Perhaps everything would be all right.



Closing his eyes briefly before turning toward his daughter, Talmadge has to summon the reserves of his energy. “Seems like you got yourself…a stand-up guy,” Talmadge teases.



CJ tilts her head to smile sweetly at Danny. “ Yeah, I think I’ll keep him.”



After a few minutes of light conversation, CJ decides that her father is too tired for their visitation to continue. With assurances that they will return in the morning and the night staff will take good care of him, CJ and Danny say their good byes. Just as they are about to leave and CJ is speaking with the night nurse, Talmadge tugs at Danny’s jacket sleeve.



“Danny, promise me…promise me that… you’re in this forever. Promise me that… you’ll always be there to look after my little girl-not that she needs to be taken care of- and that you’ll…look after whatever little Creggs might come along in…the future.” Talmadge stares pleadingly, deeply into Danny’s eyes, his nails boring into Danny’s shoulders.



Danny nods with conviction. “ Of course. You never have to worry. I’m completely committed to CJ, and I will be completely devoted to any children that we might be blessed with.”



With a satisfied nod, Talmadge sighs and leans back into his pillow, giving into his utter exhaustion.

* * *

“So, Danny, did it go okay in there with Grandpa? Did he understand who you were? Did he like you?” Hogan hands CJ a small glass of wine as Art passes Danny a beer as they gather around the kitchen at the Cregg family home. It had been a long night, but everyone had wanted a quick drink before they headed to bed.



Danny looks to CJ for confirmation for what he is about to say. “ I think it went well. He seemed very lucid, and he was certainly pleasant towards me.”



CJ smiles lightly as she sips her wine at the kitchen table. “ Compared to how he behaved when I was younger and I brought men home, it was a raging success,” CJ remarks with a quirked brow.



“Oh these Cregg men are awful with interrogating their daughter’s boyfriends,” Hogan laughs from her seat at the table next to her father. “Remember when I was sixteen and I brought that guy Todd to meet you for the first time and you completely freaked out?”



“You were too young to date,” Art replies grumpily under his breath, nursing his beer. “ You still are.”



CJ rolls her eyes at her older brother. “Art, you upset her so much and restricted her freedom to the point where she jumped on a train to Washington so she could spend a weekend venting to me.” CJ had often played mediator between the growing mother-less girl and the single father after CJ’s sister-in-law had died in a car accident when Hogan was young. Art was not a hands-on, emotionally-involved father, so Hogan often turned to her aunt for heart-to-heart talks and advice.



“Well, she’s fine now so I guess everything turned out okay, didn’t it?” Art snaps, standing up and walking his beer to the counter. He knows he had never struck the right balance between caring for his daughter and allowing her to live and express herself. He had always been a lousy father. He takes off into the living room and turns on the television, tuning it to ESPN.



“I’m zonked. I’m gonna go get ready for bed,” Hogan announces, standing up from her chair, breaking the awkward silence with her typically cheerful attitude.



With a little sigh, CJ stands to hug her niece. “Good night, sweetie.”



Hogan hugs her aunt back. “There’s extra linen in the hall closet if you’re cold. Let me know if you need anything else.”



“Thanks, honey. Have a good night. I love you.” CJ squeezes Hogan’s shoulder as the younger woman dashes out of the kitchen. She turns towards Danny sitting at the table. “ Do you wanna call it a night?”



Danny nods in agreement. “ Sounds good.” He stands up and sets his beer on the counter next to everyone else’s drinks.



CJ takes Danny’s hand and leads him through the kitchen and past the living room. “Goodnight,” CJ calls to Art, on their way to the stairway.



Art whispers “Goodnight” back without taking his eyes off of the T.V screen.



CJ and Danny ascend the staircase and CJ opens the door to the bedroom she had occupied as a child growing up in Dayton.

Danny pauses in the doorway to take in the sight before him and is slightly surprised to see the room mostly devoid of any childhood memorabilia. There is a shelf hosting figure skating and gymnastics trophies and a wall with a couple framed photographs, but other than that there is not too many remnants of a little girl’s childhood in the beige and brown painted room.



“Here we are,” CJ announces softly. “What do you think?”



“It’s…uh…not what I expected,” Danny admits hesitantly. With the perfectly matched wooden furniture and Queen-sized bed with beige and brown linen and quilts, the room just looks like any guest room.



“Why?” CJ chuckles. She rests against the doorjamb.



“I don’t know.” Danny shrugs. “ It just doesn’t look like your childhood bedroom. Where’s the stuffed animals and dolls and books and pink fluffy pillows? I thought all little girls were supposed to have that stuff.”



CJ walks over to the closet and pries open the door, exposing boxes full of old dolls, doll clothing, stuffed animals, books and pink bedding. She cocks her neck and chuckles lightly. “ Happy?”



“Why’s it all in there?” Danny inquires, coming to take a closer look.



Averting her eyes to the ground, CJ’s smile fades. “When my father’s ex-wife, Molly, moved in here a while ago, she insisted on repainting all these rooms. She thought all our old rooms looked too childish, and wanted them to look just like guest rooms. I guess it was about time.”



Standing behind her, Danny senses that CJ doesn’t want to talk about it any more. “ Hey, this one is interesting. It looks all hand-made.” Danny reaches into one of the boxes in the closet and pulls out a tattered hand-sewn plush doll.



CJ can’t help but smile as she runs her hands over the worn face of the doll. “ It was my mother’s. Back when she was growing up, her family didn’t have a lot of money to buy toys, so her mother had to make their toys. It was one of the only toys she had. Fortunately I was able to have store bought toys, but I always really loved this doll.”



Danny rubs his hand across the small of CJ’s back and kisses her temple.



CJ leans into Danny and closes her eyes. “Maybe we should get ready for bed.”



Danny stands up and offers CJ his hand so he can help her up. “Yeah. It’s been an awfully long day.”



* * *

Danny wakes up to the disorienting sound of knocking at the door. Expecting to be in their new luxurious King-size bed overlooking the pool and patio in the backyard, Danny is unpleasantly surprised to be awaken in the middle of the night. It takes him a second to realize he is not at home and that he is in Ohio at CJ’s family home and that someone is knocking at the door to CJ’s childhood bedroom where they are sleeping. When he does make the connection, he gently rouses CJ from her sleep.



“Hmm?” CJ grumbles as she curls further into Danny.



“Honey, someone’s knocking at the door.”



“CJ?” The deep voice at the door calls out.



CJ bolts up quickly. “What? Come in.”



Art hesitantly opens the door and steps into the room in his plaid pajama shirts and heavy blue sweat shirt. He scratches aimlessly at his scruffy thin beard.



“What’s wrong?” CJ demands, having instantly deduced that something must have happened for her brother to have woken them up in the middle of the night.



“The hospital called,” Art states in a hoarse whisper. “ Dad had an aneurysm.”



CJ can feel her heart almost sink in her chest. “ Oh, no.”



Danny wraps an arm around CJ’s shoulders and draws her into an embrace. “Okay, let’s go down to the hospital and see him.”



“We can’t,” Art responds evenly. “ He died.”



It takes a moment for CJ’s brain to register the statement. She shakes her head forcefully. “Oh, God. No, that, that can’t be.



Danny can hardly believe it, and he feels so terrible for CJ. He seeks to transfer his sympathy and strength to CJ through physical intimacy. He kisses her temple and closes his eyes, willing away her pain. “I can’t believe it. I’m so sorry.”



“The doctors said it came on quick. Apparently there was nothing they could do,” Art adds, standing almost motionlessly.



“What can I do? What do you need?” Danny asks of CJ, rubbing her back.



“I’m gonna wake up Hogan and call Donnie,” Art announces. “Do you want to get ready and we’ll head to the hospital? We’ll have to tell them about the funeral arrangements and everything.”



Nodding mutely, tears flow down CJ’s hollow cheeks as the reality of the situation begins to settle in.



Art quietly backs out of the room, shutting the door behind him.



Danny brings his thumb up to swipe at the tear tracks on CJ’s cheeks. “ Darling, I’m so sorry. What can I do?”



CJ grimaces, her eyes fixated on the quilt on the bed. “I just can’t believe it. He was doing so well last night. I really thought he was gonna recover from the stroke. I can’t believe I left him like that. I left him at the hospital without anyone and he was struggling and then he died all alone.” She can’t seem to wrap her head around the fact that it’s her fault he died all alone without his family by his side. She feels so guilty and responsible. She feels as if she should have been there.



“Honey,” Danny coos in his most docile tone. “ I feel awful, too. If we had have known that would have happened, we could have stayed. But it was such a long day and everyone needed to rest.”



CJ encircles her arms around Danny’s neck, lays her face against his head and buries her fingers in the red curls at the back of his neck. She inhales sharply, closing her eyes, and tries to calm herself down. “What are we gonna do?”



“First of all, let’s get washed up and put on some coffee,” Danny suggests, moving a stray strand of hair out of CJ’s eyes. “I’m sure there will be a lot of phone calls to make and arrangements to deal with.”



“Art’s executor of the will. He’ll have to call the family lawyer when the offices open,” CJ sighs.



“What can I do?” Danny asks, rubbing CJ’s fingers between his own.



CJ shrugs, shaking her head. “ Right now, not much. Maybe just go through our suitcase and find me something to wear. I’m gonna have to shower later. Now I think I should go check on Hogan. Lord knows Art’s not gonna be much of a comfort.” CJ extricates herself from Danny’s hold and the warm blankets and goes in search of Danny’s sweatshirt that he had placed on the back of the armchair.



“What about something to eat? I could make some breakfast for everyone?” Danny offers, stepping off the bed and putting his socks on.



“I’m not interested in food, but I could definitely use some coffee. Maybe we’ll grab bagels at the hospital if we’re hungry.” CJ throws the sweater over her nightshirt and goes to check on her niece.

* * *

CJ spent the entire day on auto-pilot. They had to deal with everything at the hospital, meet with the family lawyer to discuss the estate, plan the funeral arrangements with the funeral director, contact their family and friends, among a host of other activities. CJ was overcome with grief and feelings of guilt for abandoning her father (not only the previous night, but for all the years she hadn’t been in Dayton to assist him), but she had to help her brothers with the logistics and put on a brave face and be strong for her niece. Danny had been proving himself invaluable all day, cooking, running errands, and generally helping CJ and the family in whatever way he could.



“I just reserved the rooms at the hotel for the Marsen’s and Yates’” Danny tells CJ as he enters CJ’s room to find her rifling through their suitcase on the floor.



CJ whips her head around and offers Danny a grateful smile. “ Thank you.”



“What are you looking for?” Danny inquires, kneeling beside CJ on the ground next to the suitcase.



“Something to wear to the wake. I didn’t exactly pack anything appropriate for a funeral. I’m going to have to go shopping tomorrow,” CJ sighs, pulling a pair of black dress pants out of the suitcase and appraising them skeptically. “At least we brought your suit.”



Danny takes CJ’s hand and tugs her toward the bed. “I think we’ve done as much as we can do today. Donnie’s gone to his place to pack a bag. He’s going to let your cousins stay there and he’s going to take his old room here. Art’s done with everything at the nursing home.”



“Did the newspaper get the obituary listing we wrote?” CJ asks, sitting next to Danny with a heavy sigh.



“Yes,” Danny reassures CJ, running his hand up and down CJ’s arm soothingly.



“I should go check on Hogan,” CJ thinks aloud, starting to rise before Danny gently brings her back down.



“Hogan went out for coffee with some friends from Ohio State,” Danny relays.



“I don’t know what to do with myself,” CJ admits with a self-deprecating head shake and smile.



“Why don’t you lie down?” Danny suggests easily. “You’ve been going non-stop since three this morning.”



CJ adamantly shakes her head. “ No, I can’t nap,” she insists.



“I think if you just settle down and close your eyes, you’ll be surprised at how quickly sleep comes,” Danny replies softly, gazing deeply into CJ’s watery blue eyes.



The truth is, CJ doesn’t want to settle down. She’s been busying herself all day with funeral preparations so she could sublimate her guilt and sadness. She doesn’t want to think about coping with the loss of her father. “There’s so much to do…”CJ protests lamely.



Danny can’t help but smile and shake his head a little. “We’ve done everything we can do for now. I even made a casserole for dinner. All we’ve gotta do is stick it in the oven.”



CJ glances up and stares intently into Danny’s eyes. “ Danny, my father’s dead and I know that when I lie down and try to sleep I’m going to think about how much I’ll miss him…and how horrible I feel for not being there last night.” At this point, she can’t contain the emotions she’s been trying to keep inside all day. Her body begins to shake with sobs as she finally exhales and allows her tears to flow freely, uninhibited.



“Oh, baby.” Danny envelopes CJ in his arms and feathers kisses around her crown and temple. “ I know you’re gonna miss him. But, sweetheart, you can’t feel bad for not being there. He wouldn’t have even known any different.” Danny maneuvers them into a lying position on the bed.



CJ allows herself to be hugged and comforted by Danny. “I just…I don’t do grief…well.”



Danny smoothes a lock of hair behind CJ’s ear and quirks his lips at that statement. “That’s okay. You don’t have to. Whenever you want to talk about it, I’ll always be here.”



Smiling through her tears, CJ grazes Danny’s cheek with her thumb. “You’re amazing. You’ve been incredible throughout this whole thing. I can’t thank you enough.”



“Sure you can. You can thank me by lying here and taking it easy for a little while,” Danny replies softly, massaging CJ’s shoulder.



“All right, on one condition; you stay with me.” CJ feels Danny’s physical presence to be a great source of strength and comfort right now.



“That can probably be arranged,” Danny whispers.



CJ closes her eyes and focuses on Danny’s touch and the familiar scent of the aftershave on his cheek bone. Listening for the repetitive rhythm of Danny’s heartbeat, CJ notices the aching tiredness begin to seep into her bones.



* * *

When the family enters the assigned room in the funeral home where the viewing is taking place for the wake, Danny reaches for CJ’s hand. CJ glances briefly in the direction of the coffin before turning toward the door. Donnie fidgets awkwardly with his tie, uncomfortable with his formal wear, while Art mumbles something about the thermostat being on too high. Hogan, in a grey blouse and black skirt, is the only one who heads immediately to the front of the room to pay respects to her deceased grandfather.



Swallowing hard, Danny moves his free hand to the small of CJ’s back, over her modest dark grey dress. “Would you like me to go up with you?”



Running her tongue over her dry lips, CJ’s eyes dart over to a back wall. “I just...uh…need a minute. I…uh, really don’t like these things.”



Nodding in understanding, Danny squeezes CJ’s hand. “Take your time.”

Art and Donnie join Hogan at the front of the room to view Talmidge, but CJ stands back temporarily. After a couple minutes, the men retreat back to settle on the couch.



“Honey, do you think you could just stay back here for a few minutes?” CJ asks. “I think I should go up on my own.” Despite wanting Danny’s presence, CJ decides that saying goodbye to her father is something she has to do alone.



Danny nods with confirmation, agreeing with CJ’s decision. “ All right. I’ll be right here when you’re done.” He squeezes CJ’s forearm, hoping to somehow transfer more strength to her so she can cope with the difficult task ahead of her.



With a shaky inhalation of air, CJ braces herself for the inevitable. She steps toward the casket as Hogan walks toward her. “You okay, sweetie?”



With tiny tears dribbling down her eyes, Hogan nods and pushes her long blonde hair behind her back. “ Yeah. But I’m really gonna miss Grandpa.”



CJ wraps the younger woman in a hug. “I know. We all will.”



“At least we’ve got some good memories, right?” Hogan seeks confirmation, putting a positive spin on the situation.



CJ can’t help but smile at her niece. Perhaps Hogan is the only non-dysfunctional one in the whole family. “Yeah, you’ve got that right.”



“I’m gonna go get some water and touch up my makeup before everyone else gets here,” Hogan declares, letting go of CJ’s hands.



“Okay, I’ll be with you in a few minutes,” CJ replies before taking the final steps toward her father. She brushes aside a few stray strands of hair from her bangs that have not been pulled into the chignon at the nape of her neck.



CJ never thought this would be how she would say goodbye to her father. She thought they would have more time. She thought she would be there for his final moments on Earth. She had been so wrapped up with Bartlet’s administration these past eight years that she hadn’t spent nearly as much time with her father as she should have.



I’m sorry, Daddy. I should have been there. I shouldn’t have put my job before you. You needed me.



Talmidge looks down upon his only daughter with a sympathetic smile. “It’s okay, my dear. I was proud that you were serving the President and the country. I wanted you to be in Washington.”



The last two days, CJ had been feeling as if she would never forgive herself, but for some reason she is suddenly beginning to feel more at peace with her inner father abandonment issues.



Anyway, I don’t know what I’m going to do without you. We’ll all miss you so much. I came across your mathematics book when we were clearing out the stuff at the nursing home. I didn’t understand half of it, but it was definitely a good read. We’ve all got copies. Hogan’s got it on her desk at Ohio State. Speaking of her, she’s going to read a beautiful poem at the funeral tomorrow. She’s been handling everything so well. She’s grown into such an incredible young woman, despite not having a mother around. Her and Art have a lot of stuff to work out, but I know his heart is in the right place, just like yours was when Mom died and you had to raise us on your own. I know you felt inadequate, but you were a great father and I never once doubted how loved I was. And speaking of Mom, I hope you’re reunited now and spending all your time in love again. If you can hear any of this, please tell her how much I still love and miss her. I only knew her for thirteen years, but her love and guidance has permeated my being. I only hope that if I’m ever blessed with becoming a mother, I can give my child all the love and patience and energy that she gave us for all those years.



Jean Cregg beams down at her baby girl as she clings to the hands of her husband. “Oh, darling, I wish our time hadn’t been cut so short. But I was so proud of how you stepped up and became a woman. And I know that you will make a wonderful mother. Have patience, my love. Your father tells me Danny has a good soul, and I’ve got it on good authority that your marriage will be blessed with the gift of life in good time. And nothing could make me more glad than to see you basking in the happiness of your soul mate and precious child.”



CJ’s eyes mist with wetness, but she had had already experienced her big meltdown with Danny the other day, so she doesn’t feel as if she is going to break down. She simply hates the sight of the grayish tinged face of her father’s face and doesn’t know what else to say in her silent prayer.



I know that you felt these last few years like you were weak. You couldn’t remember how to do the simple, every day things, so you had to live in a nursing home and have caregivers assist you on a regular basis. But I need you to know that I won’t remember you like that. For all of my life you were the strong one. You were the strong, protective father. You taught me how to ride a bike, while insisting that I wear a helmet. You were intelligent and provided for the family, you were a rock and unshakable. I hardly ever saw anything bother you. You could always give me sound advice. There wasn’t a problem you couldn’t solve, whether that was a mathematical formula or the key to electoral victory. You did everything you could to make sure I had to tools to succeed, and you tried to protect me even as an adult. And even on the last day of your life, when you were recovering from a stroke, you were trying to get to know my fiancé so you could determine if he was worthy enough to marry me. So, I don’t want you to think that this horrible disease, while robbing you of remnants of your memory, robbed you of your dignity. I’ll always think the world of you. In my mind, you’ll always be my strong father. You’ll always be my hero. And I’ll never stop loving you.



CJ closes her eyes for a moment, inhaling sharply to compose herself.



Goodbye, Daddy.

I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories



Remember all the good times that we had

We let them slip away from us when things got bad

Clearly I first saw you, smiling in the sun

I want to feel your warmth upon me, I want to be the one



I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories



I'm so tired,

But I can't sleep

Standin' on the edge of something much too deep

It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word

We are screaming inside, we can't be heard



I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories



I'm so afraid to love you, but more afraid to lose

Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose

Once there was a darkness, a deep and endless night

Gave me everything you had,

Oh, you gave me life



And I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories



I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories

Weep not for the memories



She turns around and slowly makes her way back to Danny who is standing off beside one of the doors at the back. CJ clears the lump in her throat and reaches her hands forward for Danny’s hands.

Danny gently squeezes CJ’s hands comfortingly before bringing one arm up to draw her shoulders into his chest. He kisses her forehead and dries the tiny tear rimming in her eyelids with the pad of his thumb. “How ya doing?”

CJ’s lips turn up into a weak smile. “I hate having to say goodbye, but I know that he’s in a better place now. Maybe he’s reunited with my mom for the first time in thirty years.”



“I’m sure he is,” Danny replies positively, glad that CJ seems to be taking it all in stride and did not become overly emotional upon seeing the deceased body of her father.



CJ closes her eyes momentarily, grounding herself. “And the important thing, as Hogan noted, is that we’ve got good memories. I’ll never forget where I came from, and I will remember him.”

I've now got the new LiveJournal Messenger. My Windows Live ID is laurah2215@livejournal.com. Sign up now and we can chat!

Not a whole lot going on. I've been immersed in LSAT prep study since Wed. We did go for a BBQ at a park and out the 50's Diner for dinner, which was nice. But since then I've been basically just doing the online lessons, tests and homework from the insane amount of material I have. I work on it when Nicholas is napping and took alot of time Sat & Sun to study. I went downtown Walkerton to get highlights on Sat since my hair was driving me nuts with the roots growing in. It looks better now. Looking forward the weekend when we're going to the trailer for a week.

Title: Separation Anxiety

Series: The Concannon's Present, Past and Future

Author: Laura H

Rating:PG/Teen

Disclaimer:Are we still doing this? I'm a twenty-one year-old student with a bus pass. You'd be better off to sue my dog.

Synopsis: Danny and CJ travel to New Hampshire for the Library Dedication

Author’s Notes: 4 stories in like three weeks? Yeah, it must be my holiday break from school.

Story 1: I Loved Her First

Story2- Just Another Day in Paradise

Story 3: My Little Girl

Story 4:Chivalry Isn't Dead

Story 5:He's Just Sensitive

Story 6: The Hardest Conversation Ever

Story 7: Letting Go

Story 8: Getting Good at New Things

Story 9: Where We Need to Be

Story 10: Always Loved By Me You're Gonna Be

Story 11: Endings and Beginnings

Story 12: Proud of the House We Built

Story 13:Starting a Club

Story 14: First Pet

Story 15: Miscommunication

Story 16:The Go-Between

Story 17: The Third and Fourth Wheel

Story 18: You Can Let Go

Story 19: Make the World Go Away

Story 20:Invalid

Story 21-Hands on  a Miracle

Story 22- And at the End and the Beginning Was You

Story 23-Reunions

Story 24- The Lord Giveth and the Lord Taketh Away

Story 25-Separation Anxiety

 

Timeline:Nov 2006- CJ and Danny finally see what they've been missing for

eight years. Story 19- Make the World Go Away

Jan 2007- Story 24- "The Lord Giveth and the Lord Taketh Away".CJ and Danny move to California together. CJ becomes

President of the Hollis Foundation. Danny begins writing Josiah

Bartlet's biography.

July 2007-CJ and Danny get married at the Bartlet farm and conceive

Abigail during their honeymoon in Ireland.

August 2007:Story 13-"Starting a Club"

Sept 2007- Danny starts school to finish his doctorate

Nov 2007-Story 20 "Invalid"

Feb 2008- Abigail is born

March 2009-Patrick is born.

August 2009:Story 25-"Separation Anxiety"

August 2010:Story 23-"Reunions"

January 2011: Story 5-He's Just Sensitive"

Sept 2013:Story 2-"Just Another Day in Paradise"

Nov 2013- February 2014: Story 3- "My Little Girl"

May 2015: Story 14- "First Pet"

June 2020:Story 16-"The Go-Between"

June 2021: Story 4- "Chivalry Isn't Dead"

June 2021: Story 17: "The Third and Fourth Wheels"

Jan 2025:Story 6-"The Hardest Conversation Ever"

March 2025: Story 7- "Letting Go"

June 2029-Story 11 "Endings and Beginnings"

May 2032: Story 1-Abigail's wedding- "I Loved Her First"

July 2032: Story 8- "Getting Good at New Things"

September 2032: Story 9-"Where We Need to Be"

January 2033: Story 10-"Always Loved By Me You're Gonna Be

July 2033: Story 12- "Proud of the House We Built"

September 2033: Story 15-"Miscommunication"

March 2044:-“You Can Let Go”

 

 

 

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      "Hey, hon', you got a little…" Danny points to CJ's chest as he unloads the groceries CJ had picked up on her way home from work.

 

 

      CJ sets the bananas on the kitchen counter and glances down at her blouse to find a small wet patch around her left breast. " Oh, my God. I've been walking around work and the super market like this."

 

 

     Danny tries to contain his grin but fails miserably. He can't help but smirk, and his wife notices and fixes him with a death glare.

 

 

     "What? You think my lactation embarrassment is funny? God, Danny." CJ grabs the dish towel and dabs at her shirt. " If I wasn't trying to get your child off my breasts so we could go to this Library dedication thing then I wouldn't be going through this."

 

 

     "I'm…I'm sorry, honey. You're right. It's nothing to laugh at. Come here." Danny draws her in for a quick hug  before they are interrupted by a crying baby upstairs. "I'll get him," Danny tells CJ with a peck on the lips, before dashing out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

 

 

     CJ sighs in frustration before returning her attention to putting away the groceries. Since she had started back at work part-time two weeks ago, she had been trying to ease the five month old off of nursing. She's currently just breast-feeding at night to give the baby comfort during the night.  But she and Danny are supposed to go to New Hampshire in three days so she wants Patty to be  completely comfortable with the bottle.

 

 

       "Look who's here," Danny whispers excitedly to the two babies in both of his arms as he re-enters the kitchen.

 

 

     CJ's face instantly lights up at the sight of both her freshly rested children in her husband's arms. She throws the last of the groceries into the fridge and lifts Abbey (who is reaching excitedly for her mother) into her arms. "Hello, my darlings. Did you have a good day with Daddy?" CJ sits at the counter and proceeds to smother her eighteen-month old in kisses.  Motherhood may have its downfalls and challenges, but she loves coming home in the afternoon and taking her babies into her arms.

 

 

      "Painted, Mama!" Abbey relays in glee.

 

 

     CJ's jaw drops and her eyes dilate in a show of excitement for her daughter. "You finger painted? Oh, you're a lucky girl. Did Daddy give you a bath and  read to you?"

 

 

     Abbey nods while playing with CJ's necklace. "Okay, sweetheart. Make room for your baby brother." CJ reaches out to take her son into her other arm and kisses him soundly on the forehead. So far Abbey has adjusted well to her new sibling. She is too young to really possess any feelings of jealously. So long as the baby doesn't get all the attention, Abbey is satisfied knowing that Mommy and Daddy can love her and her baby brother equally.  CJ is almost glad she didn't have Patrick a year later or else Abbey might have felt hurt and jealous and begun regressing to secure the attention of her parents.

 

 

     "Mommy's home," Danny declares with sparkling eyes. Sometimes he's exhausted after caring for two babies all day, but as soon as his wife comes home and they can be a family again, he is reminded that he is the doing the right thing by letting CJ return to her job. They're all very happy with their station in life. After practically two decades of living in bachelor apartments and travelling the globe looking for the best story, Danny enjoys slowing down to domestic life in California.  He still gets time to work from home, but the majority of his day is occupied by the children.

 

 

      "And I'm so glad," CJ responds with a sincere smile. "When does your mother's plane land tomorrow?" Cuddling the kids in her arms, CJ turns to Danny who is pouring them some iced tea from a pitcher in the fridge.

 

 

      "Three. So I figured I'd leave to pick her up when you got home. That way I don't have to lug the babies and their fifty pounds of accessories with me."  Danny reclaims his stool and hands CJ her glass.

 

 

     "Their stuff outweighs them by like two times," CJ agrees, shifting Abbey so she can better support Patrick. " All right. I'll try to be back by two." Danny's mother is coming to stay with the kids while they travel back East for the weekend.  When CJ gave birth to Patrick, Rosalyn Concannon stayed with them in Santa Monica for a month helping with Abigail and Patrick. Since then she had only returned to California once, about eight weeks ago, She would certainly notice a change in the development of both kids.

 

 

      "You okay?" Danny inquires softly, judging CJ's facial expression to read that she is worried.

 

 

      "We've never been away from the babies this long," CJ articulates with a self-deprecating frown. She knows she is probably behaving ridiculously, after all Rosalyn Concannon has raised two children almost entirely by herself. But she's also in her seventies and isn't accustom to babies full-time anymore. " I mean, the most we've left Abbey is twenty-four hours. I've never spent a night without Patty."

 

 

      "It's gonna be okay," Danny tells her soothingly, reaching out to rub her shoulder. "My mom is an expert at this. They'll be all right. Abbey, princess, are you gonna have fun with Nana this weekend?" Danny smiles at the little girl to get her to negate CJ's feelings of apprehension.

 

 

     "Watch Elmo!" Abbey responds with a toothy grin. She knows that whenever her grandmother visits, she brings her new DVDs of Sesame Street to watch.

 

 

      Danny raises a brow to as if to say 'I told you so'. "See? They'll be fine."

 

 

     CJ smiles uncertainly. "Yeah, I know. I'm just gonna miss them like crazy."

 

 

      Danny lays a hand on CJ's hand and looks deeply into her eyes. "Darling, we can’t stay behind. You put your whole life for nine plus years into serving that man and his administration. You were his longest serving senior adviser. You're not gonna miss this library dedication. You deserve this opportunity."

 

 

     "I know. But Patrick's…"CJ begins to protests.

 

 

      "Gonna be fine," Danny interrupts with a firm nod. " We'll have both our cell phones on and my mother will have all the emergency numbers she'll need. At this point I'm more worried about your separation anxiety than that of the children."

 

 

     CJ's lips turn into a half smile. "Okay, fine. But just so you know, you'll need to keep up this whole loving, supportive husband thing all weekend if I'm gonna get through it."

 

 

     Danny grins at his wife, absolutely in love with her. They are both incredibly protective and loving parents, and he wouldn't have it any other way. " I can do that. I've had a lot of practice."

 

 

      "Some of the other guys who don't have two children under two might make fun of you," CJ states pointedly with a tiny smirk.

 

 

      "I can take it," Danny assures her with a laugh. " This is gonna be good. This will be good for everyone."

 

 

     Inhaling sharply, CJ gives her head a shaky bob. "I hope so."

 

 

       *                                              *                                                                                         *

 

      "CJ?" Danny slides their luggage into the rental car at the airport and notices CJ has already turned on her cell phone and pressed the speed dial to connect her to their house line. "Are you calling already?"

 

 

     CJ waves him off as she slips into the passenger seat. " Hi, Rosalyn. I was just calling to see how it was going."

 

 

 

       Danny gives his head a shake while smirking as he lowers himself into the driver's seat and eaves drop on CJ's end of the conversation.

 

 

      "Yeah, Abbey can have apple juice with her snack but please don't give her any around dinner time or she'll fill up on that and not eat her food....Right, she can have milk with dinner. Oh, and I think I forgot to tell you that Patty can't sleep without his pacifier... Yes, I know you love the kids and are fully capable…I know, Rosalyn. I'm just worried…Yes, I'll stop worrying and have a good trip…Yeah, of course. I'll call to check in tonight…Thank you again…We will. Bye now." CJ ends the call and leans back into her seat with a sigh.

 

 

      "Did she tell you to bugger off?" Danny asks with a knowing smile. He has perfect confidence in his mother's ability to watch the children. Although he still misses the children, he isn't as worried as CJ is.

 

 

    CJ rolls her eyes. " Basically. She said for us to relax and have a good time. The kids are behaving wonderfully and she's totally fine."

 

 

     "See? Doesn't that make you feel better?" Danny steers them out of the airport on their way to Manchester.

 

 

     "No," CJ blubbers with a pout.

 

 

     "Why not?" Danny asks in confusion.

 

 

      "Because then it means they don't need us. If they can get along perfectly with just any adult then we're not really good parents. Maybe they don't love me." CJ's lips tremble and she tries to fight off the hormones. She'll be grateful to be through with breast-feeding.

 

 

      Danny reaches to squeeze CJ's hand. "First of all, my mother isn't any old adult. She's their grandmother, they know her very well and she's exceptionally qualified to look after them. And second, we're great parents and those kids adore you.  Look how excited they get when you come home from work every day. We're not that easily replaced, but it is a good thing that other people can babysit. It's good for us to have a few days without them every once in a while. If this weekend turns out well then maybe you and I can take a vacation occasionally."

 

 

      CJ forces a nod and attempts to compose herself.  She doesn't want her former colleagues to see her as an over-attached, protective mother who can't leave her children for more than a few hours.  She wants them to know that while motherhood has completely changed her life priorities, she is still CJ Cregg and she's capable of multi-tasking. She wants to show them that she can be a mother and still have a demanding, worth-while career.

1.                                                                                                    *                                                                                             *

 

 

    

 

 

 

    

 

 

     

 

 

 

   

 

    

 

   

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Okay, I've got your water and tea and copy of TV Guide." Danny waltzes into CJ's bedroom with a tray of drinks and food.

 

 

      "You know I don't actually have to live in my bed, right?" CJ adjusts herself in the bed and searches for her glasses.

 

 

     "The doctor prescribed bed rest, and that's what you're going to get. Aside from getting up to use the washroom, you're not leaving this room."  Danny sets the tray on CJ's lap and perches on the side of her bed.

 

 

      CJ lifts the herbal tea to her lips and takes a sip. "You're such a mother hen. I should have taken Abbey's offer to stay at the Residence. She wouldn't have been this bad, and at least I'd be close to work."

 

 

      "You're not working. You're going to lie in your bed and eat soup and watch soap operas for the next few days," Danny instructs CJ, arranging her pillows behind her back.

 

 

      "I promised I'd take it easy, but  no one mentioned watching T.V. in the middle of the day. Can you hand me my briefing books on the dresser?"  CJ points across the room.

 

 

 

      "No. The President told you not to work for a few days." Danny stands firm, grabbing the remote off CJ's nightstand and flicking on the television set mounted to the wall of her room opposite the bed.

 

 

 

     "There's a conference call between the Chinese and Russians I want to be on tomorrow. I've got to make sure a nuclear war doesn't break out over oil. Please hand me my binder or I'll get up to retrieve it myself," CJ tells him sternly, ready to push herself out of the bed.

 

 

      "Claudia Jean," Danny grits between his clenched jaw.

 

 

      "Daniel," CJ replies between her own teeth.

 

 

      "Okay, a compromise?" Danny offers with his hands up in surrender. He was sent by the First Lady to keep a close eye on their patient, and he wouldn't be able to keep his promise to Abbey Bartlet if CJ kicked him out of her apartment.

 

 

      "What?" CJ's brows rise challengingly.

 

 

     "If you relax in  bed for a few hours, you can read your memos for one hour. You can take the teleconference tomorrow if you promise me not to do anymore work the rest of the day." At CJ's look of protest, Danny continues. " Come on. Work with me, CJ.  The doctors wanted you take off a full seventy-two hours before doing some work from home.  The President wants you to rest up. I'm sayin' you can do an hour of work today and two hours tomorrow. I'm trying to make you feel better, mostly because not doing work will cause you more stress than doing nothing."

 

 

    CJ seems to be considering the offer as she halts her stare-down. "Fine. But what am I gonna do now?"

 

 

      Danny smiles warmly and wraps an arm around CJ, climbing onto the bed beside her. " Well, I thought I'd make some soup for dinner. I brought over some chicken stock and fresh vegetables from my apartment.  But we can sit and watch some television and talk for the afternoon."

 

 

      "Don't you have somewhere to be?" CJ asks with a sly smile.

 

 

      "Nope. I'm done work as of three days ago.  My only job now is nursing you back to health," Danny tells her with a flirty smirk.

 

 

      "All right, but if you're gonna be my nurse I'll have to insist on a sponge bath later," CJ responds with a fake coy smile.

 

 

      "Oh, I suppose that could be arranged," Danny replies with sarcastic show of lack of enthusiasm,

 

 

•                                                                             *                                           *

 

      "You need anything?" Danny inquires, reaching his right hand over to hold CJ's right one. He is lying next to her in the bed, but on top of the duvet.

 

 

      "Nope. You know what I've realized today?" CJ takes a small sip of the juice in her other hand. Danny has been pushing the fluids all day long. He got her to eat some soup and drink herbal tea, water and juice.

 

 

     "Mmm?" Danny leans back against his pillow. He had just finished cleaning the kitchen after their small dinner. So far the day had been going well.  He had managed to get CJ to rest (she even took a nap) while also providing her enough breathing space so she wouldn't feel like she was still back at the hospital.

 

 

     "I am never going to retire. Seriously. If this T.V. programming is what I'll have to keep my days occupied, I have good reason to keep busy for the rest of my life. I absolutely hate this. T.V sucks today." CJ shakes her head as she flicks through the stations. Danny  had banned CNN and CSPAN, so she isn't allowed to let the remote settle on those channels.

 

 

     Danny chuckles in agreement. " Yeah, well thankfully there are numerous other entertainment venues for us to enjoy over the next few months without work."

 

 

      "Yeah," CJ whispers. " How…is this…building a life thing gonna work?"

 

 

      "What do you mean?" Danny seeks clarification.

 

 

      "I mean…what do we do next? I'm probably going to need to move to California to set up the Hollis Foundation. Are you going to keep your apartment in Georgetown and will we travel back and forth on weekends or whatever?" CJ probably wouldn't have asked Danny this if she wasn't going to be locked in her apartment with him for the next few days. She figures they might as well use their time to figure out their next steps.

 

 

      "Well, we could do that," Danny concedes with a small nod. " But I was thinking I could follow you to California. There's nothing really keeping me here. Most of my writing I can do from anywhere. I'll need to fly to New York to meet with my publisher and make trips to New Hampshire to see the President, but there's no reason why I can't move to California."

 

 

      CJ tilts her head in surprise. "You want to move to California with me? Danny, I don't want you to do something you don't want to just because of me. I don't want you to ever resent…"

 

 

     Danny stops her with a finger to her lips. " Never.  I will never resent you. I'm am so ready to be with you full-time now. We've waited so long to be together and create a life like a normal couple. There's nothing I want more than to live with you."

 

 

     "You wanna live together?" CJ asks, again a little surprised.

 

 

     "Yeah, of course. Do you not want that?" Danny is afraid he over-estimated their plans for the future. He assured CJ that they could wait until after the Inauguration to discuss their future plans. He doesn't want to scare her off now.

 

 

      "Yes, it's just…I haven't lived with a man since Ben back in college. I'm not used to sharing my life with another person," CJ admits painfully. "I don't wanna mess this up." Her voice indicates that she does want to live with him, she's just terrified of screwing it up. Danny had waited so long for her and she doesn't want his efforts to have been in vain. He deserves a woman who can love him properly.

 

 

 

      Danny smiles encouragingly and drops a gentle kiss to CJ's parted lips. " We're gonna get good at new things."

 

 

       With a shaky inhalation of air, CJ nods as confidently as she can. " Yeah, we will. So... we're moving to California?"

 

 

       Danny beams at the conclusion. "Yes.  And actually, once you return to the office next week if you're feeling better, I could fly to California and look for some houses near the Hollis Inc. headquarters. That way you won't have to deal with the stress of finding a place to live as soon as you're finished your job."

 

 

      CJ has to smile at that idea. " A house? You're gonna look for a house for us to live in? Like…like normal people?"

 

 

      Danny laughs deep in his throat before hugging CJ closer. " Yeah. I'm sick of apartments. I don't wanna be a bachelor anymore. It's time we got a real home. Who knows, maybe one day we won't be the only ones living in it?"

 

 

      CJ laughs lightly. "You're thinking we'll have termites?"

 

 

      Danny revels in the sound of CJ's laughter, glad she's found her sense of humour again.  He had missed the sound of her joking around. " I was thinkin' maybe we'd have children."

 

 

     CJ's face falls instantly. " Danny, I know the doctor said I could still have a baby, but I don't want you to get your hopes up. I'm forty-four years old and have been on the Pill for like twenty years.  It might not happen. So if you're moving in with me so we can some day have a family together, then maybe we shouldn't do this.  I don't know if that will happen. I don't want to disappoint you."

 

 

      Danny's face contorts in pain. He doesn't want CJ to think that is the only reason he loves her. " You'll never disappoint me.  I'm not spending my life with you just to have children. I want to move in together because I love you and don't want to spend my days and nights without you. Even if we never had a baby, I would be insanely in love with you. We'll be happy just to have each other. But if you want, we'll look at all the options-fertility specialists, artificial insemination, surrogacy, adoption…whatever. It's totally up to you. But I'll be happy with just you." 

 

 

     CJ smiles faintly, a little shy. "Really?"

 

 

      "Definitely," Danny whispers with the sweet smile that melts CJ's heart.

 

 

      "Okay. So, we're gonna move to a house in California?" CJ states this slowly, letting it all sink in.

 

 

      Danny nods confidently. "Yeah."

 

 

    CJ leans into Danny's shoulder with a deep, relaxing sigh. They were going to be just fine.